what if jessie and james are completely genderfluid and decide each day who feels like being “jessie” and who feels like being “james”. nobody has ever noticed
Just hold on we’re going home
my friends sister was telling me about how in highschool a guy tried to take a picture up her skirt as she was walking up stairs and she saw, grabbed his phone, broke it in half, and handed it back to him and said “you can tell your mom why your phones broken”
do you ever start a multiple choice question and just when you think you have the answer you see “all the above” or “none of the above” opinion and you start you question your entire life?
Has this been done before? I don’t know, but I did it. Ponyostuck.
I mean come on. Evil underwater wizard set on destroying the surface world to bring back a new age of the oceans. A fish princess falling in love with land dweller.
Now with part two.
Sometimes I think to myself, “do I really want to buy another chocolate bar?”
And then I remember that there is a super volcano under Yellowstone that is 40,000 years overdue and when it erupts it could potentially cover most if north America in ash and create a volcanic winter that kills half the worlds population
And I’m like, fuck yeah I want that chocolate bar
This person has the most real values to date
My faith in pizza guys has gone up 123%
NO LET ME TELL YOU A STORY
So a few weeks ago I was in a hotel in Savannah with my grampa in the hospital next door, Mom was over staying with him, and the battery in the smoke detector went out so every 5 minutes it would let off this loud, high pitched ‘CHIRP’.
It was annoying as fuck, so I called the front desk to see if they had a battery for it, and they said the only thing they could do was change rooms. We’d already settled in for the night, and needed the next door rooms for my uncles the next day, so I said I’d deal. My uncles had my car in the next town over, so I couldn’t drive and get one myself.
An hour later, I’m ordering pizza and have gone insane because the damn thing CHIRPS. SO. MUCH.
So I begged the pizza guy on the phone to stop and get me a battery, told him I’d pay for the battery, and give him an extra tip for it, and he was chill with it. This adorable fucker gets to my room with the battery, opens it, asks to see the smoke detector, CLIMBS ON THE BED, CHANGES THE BATTERY FOR ME, and tests it.
My pizza was only 20 dollars, but I gave him 40 and told him to keep the change.
Sollux you weak piece of shit
DUDE SHUT UP
DAVE YOU ARE BEING DISRUPTIVE.
I WILL TAKE ALL YOU MOTHERFCUKERS DOWN
COME THE FUCK AT ME I CAN FUCK YOU UP WITH MY HANDS TIED BEHIND MY BAC DONT TEST ME MOTHERFUCKERS
DAVID LORAINE STRIDER I WILL NEVER ALCHEMIZE APPLE JUICE FOR YOU EVER AGAIN IF YOU DON’T STOP ACTING LIKE A LITTLE SHIT RIGHT NOW
OH MY GOD I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS TO COME BACK
Seizure First Aid.
Learn it. Share it. Know it. Use it.
so basically when you have your period and your lower back hurts it is because your hips are contracting and spreading apart, only slightly, to make room for the release of the blood and linings of your uterus. so basically your body is going through a small and mild labor to push out the dead insides of your uterus. so basically I have gone through labor and basically I don’t want children.